Last Saturday, the 3rd, marked the beginning of my fourth month. 16 weeks down, 24 to go. So far the second trimester hasn't been much different than the first, but once we learned the key to controlling the morning sickness, the first wasn't really that bad. We have our next monthly appointment this Thursday, and a month after that we find out what we're having. The closer it gets the more excited I am. I can't wait to start on the nursery, buy some cute outfits, pick out names, etc. I truly don't care whether it's a boy or a girl. There are so many different good things that come with each!
I've wondered when I would really start to feel like a parent; whether it would be while I'm still carrying the baby, or when it's born, or maybe a while after that. Then, a week or two ago, I had my first taste of what it feels like to be a mother. I've mentioned in a previous post the story of Audrey Caroline. (READ IT! Read it now! It's a heartbreaking story, but inspiring too.) She was the daughter of Todd and Angie Smith. Todd is one of the singers in Selah. I was up late one night reading the story again. I cried plenty the first time I read it; add the pregnancy hormones this second time, and a blubbering mess ensues. At one point I felt a staggeringly strong need to protect my own unborn child. Over and over, I prayed, "God, protect my baby. God, protect my baby." I won't fully understand what it means to be a mother until this little one comes into the world, but for the time being, I think I have an idea.